Wednesday, September 1, 2010
On Antidepressants
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
If Mama Ain't Happy...
Friday, July 23, 2010
Mad Scientists at Work
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Talk About Cherry-Picking
I have been mulling over the prospect of a new practice; this is exactly the start-up idea I was looking for.
Let us dispense with the longueurs of the 15-minute visit. Even allowing for the luxury of a 5-minute bathroom break, I can envision 11 accelerated diagnostic evaluations per hour. The Adderall scripts will by flying fast and furious.
(Note to DEA: this is a satirical post).
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Vignette
I: "How did the medication go?"
(Sheepish look). "Well, I got the prescription filled, but then I got scared and threw it away."
(Later in session, he): "You went to school for ten years to do this?"
"Yeah, it seemed like longer at the time."
(Later in session, he): "Is your job hard or easy?"
"Mumble, mumble, mumble."
Now I can't get it out of my head. Is it dishearteningly hard, or is it laughably easy? I discover that there is no objective way to gauge this. By how many years it takes to obtain society's assent to do it? By how one feels at the end of the day? By "outcome measures?"
What a comedian.
The Rest of the Story
Lear
I haven't been inspired to write here the past couple of days, yet here I sit, typing. Why? Because writing is what I have to do; if it weren't here it would be somewhere else. The standard advice for writer's block, or even writer's procrastination, is to sit down, stare at the blank (screen), and write something, anything. As Lear also said, "Nothing will come of nothing." But out of something, something else may come. Granted, this write-at-all-costs mantra was pre-Internet; the adage was never to write something, anything for instantaneous, theoretically global release.
I've always been fascinated by the attractions and repulsions that operate between people--animal magnetism, as it were. Obviously a lot of what folks like me do professionally is to commiserate, if nothing else, with people for the slings and arrows of romantic entanglements. Those are interesting enough, but arguably parent-child relationships are more powerful in the end. Partners come and go, but parents, siblings and children are for life.
Except when they aren't. I'm always intrigued by family secrets of distancing and estrangement. Siblings who grow up sharing so many intense experiences during impressionable youth may turn out to live totally different lives, perhaps to have little to say to one another, perhaps to squabble bitterly over the inheritance or worse. Through what mysterious genetic and social unfoldings does the black sheep acquire his hue?
I've noted before that parenting gone bad seems to engender some of the worst suffering one sees. The divorced father who can't see his children. The dumbfounded mother who sees her boys turn into drug addicts and criminals. And then there is the puzzling torture of the child who won't communicate at all.
I see one every once in while, a middle-aged father or mother whose child is incommunicado. They may seem harmless enough--a woman whose chronic depression may have made her emotionally unavailable to her children, or a man whose alcoholism and workaholism may have left family scars. Their child (or sometimes all the children, or sometimes one child and not the others) not only won't maintain a relationship, but supposedly won't even grant a reason why. Calls and letters not answered, and no forwarding address. The silence is more exquisitely painful than any denunciation.
Was there some unspeakable atrocity of abuse? Most things in life may be atoned for if undertaken with sufficient sincerity, but perhaps not all. Or is this a case of an unforgiving child who has embraced the path of ruthlessness? How much "honor," in the Ten Commandments sense, is owed to the dishonorable mother or father? To the merely inadequate mother or father?
Family secrets. In encountering a person one confronts a subjective world unto itself, and yet there are parallel worlds giving onto a mutual universe. The "history" one obtains one is merely one volume of a potentially infinite library that is a family. The empty chairs in the office may speak alternative volumes. Their would-be occupants may sit in other, similar offices, next to other, similarly empty chairs.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Non-physician, Heal Thyself
But the word I'm looking for involves co-opting the tools of doctors without having to resort to the doctors themselves in the same way that an autodidact bypasses educators or a vigilante bypasses law enforcement. It is surprisingly common for folks, lacking access to a doctor for reasons of money or transportation, to obtain meds from whatever source they can find. To be sure, these are often opioids or benzodiazepines, but by no means always. I saw a woman recently with bipolar disorder who had been obtaining Seroquel samples from her sister, who is a nurse. And if someone is going to run out of Effexor a week before he can get in with a doctor, who could blame him for scrounging up seven doses wherever he can? After all, it's not as if the medical system is flexible and easy to work with.
If someone has been prescribed Xanax for anxiety symptoms with positive results in the past, and finds himself between doctors for whatever logistical reasons, is it wrong for him to obtain Xanax in unconventional ways if he never exceeds a typically prescribed dose? The Drug Enforcement Agency would say yes, presumably, and certainly this isn't a practice one should condone, but does it constitute substance abuse? I don't think so, if he has a legitimate anxiety disorder and no substance abuse history. In this case it would be no different from someone using a friend's unused antibiotics for a (self-diagnosed) sinus infection. And consider that, because doctors are often understandably hypervigilant and restrictive as regards controlled substances, it may be hard even for patients who quite appropriately need and use them to gain access.
To be sure, medicine has a procedure for enabling this practice in cases where it's considered safe: it's called making a drug available over the counter. And doctors have a way of frowning on any circumvention of their alleged wisdom. Indeed, patients who engage in this practice (for which I can't think of a name) may simply have below average respect for authority in general (but perhaps above average resourcefulness). This practice has family resemblances both with people who decide on a medication for themselves based on television commercials and with physicians who liberally prescribe themselves medications (not recommended). All of these undertakings stem from the natural assumption that if you want something done right, you'd better do it yourself. "Self-doctoring" may be the term, but I wish there were something more felicitous...
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Straight Shooter
A 55-year-old gentleman with a vague history of schizophrenia was brought in by a community support worker for a new evaluation, apparently at the behest of a family member, although there was no report of specific symptoms or dangerous behavior. But he had recently moved back to the area, so maybe the family just assumed he ought to get an evaluation for regular treatment.
He presented as somewhat disheveled, with a glazed look in his eyes; he was calm and pleasant enough, albeit quite flat and concrete, answering questions minimally. He couldn't or wouldn't say much about his psychiatric history other than to acknowledge the diagnosis of schizophrenia, multiple previous hospitalizations, and the experience of monthly injections at some point in the past. "What brought you back here from Texas?" "Greyhound bus." For a fleeting moment I thought he was wryly joking (for which his manner otherwise certainly would not have prepared me), but no such luck. So I settled myself uncomfortably into the plane of the literal for the duration.
When I asked him how much alcohol he drank, though (I long ago stopped asking people whether they drink, and now go straight to how much), he answered, "As much as I can." For a second again I wondered about some sly humor on his part, but he was deadpan. Yet his response had the kind of upbeat, slightly dutiful tone one might use to answer a question like "Do you get regular exercise?" But he wouldn't quantify.
So I moved on to marijuana (for which I have also recently moved directly to asking how much)--the complacent yet somewhat eager reply was, "As often as I can get it." "How often is that?" He just shrugged. On to cocaine, for which I still ask whether rather than how much. "Crack," he assented, nodding with an attitude somewhere between satisfaction and gusto. "Do you think any of those drugs could be a problem?" Incomprehension. "Has anyone told you these substances could be bad for you?" "No, nobody ever told me that!" he countered, baffled yet dismissive.
The interview unwound from there. As we returned to his diagnosis, I learned that he had actually "gotten over" his schizophrenia. "Would you consider taking medication again?" "No." (There was more to it, but this was the gist).
In a world of duplicity and innuendo, particularly surrounding substance use and treatment compliance, this was actually refreshing. There was no need to dance around the facts, as it was abundantly clear that he had no use for me, and our relationship at this point could blissfully and neatly come to an end. No hard feelings.
The community support worker, driving him home with a couple of other patients from the same area, stopped at a store to pick up something. The fellow went in and emerged with a beer; upon being told that he couldn't bring the beer in the car, he proceeded to chug it in the parking lot.
One more thing: he does receive Social Security disability payments monthly. Tax dollars hard at work.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Look for Me on "60 Minutes"
The common mantra now is that if you have depression, seek treatment because it is a treatable illness. By all means seek treatment, but part of psychiatry's soft underbelly (well, okay, psychiatry is really pretty soft all over, a real pussycat) is the weakness of its antidepressant treatments.
Based on both my clinical experience and my understanding of the literature, I don't buy the argument that antidepressants are a vast fraud, no better than placebo. But they're certainly not as robust as many would like to believe.
Often in this blog I have been critical of psychiatry, and the profession has left a lot to be desired in terms of the results it delivers. And I know that the most puerile response to criticism of any field is to say, "Well, do you think you could do better?" As my recently profiled favorite Samuel Johnson put it, one needn't be skilled at making tables in order to offer an informed critique of a particular table.
However, when the antipsychiatry folks shake their heads in disgust when patients end up on multiple medications, often "off label" and carrying significant side effects, I can't help wondering what they would do if faced with the patients psychiatrists see. Tell them to eat healthy food, get fresh air and exercise, find God, get married, get divorced, get a therapist? What if you do all these things and a hundred more, and try all the FDA-indicated treatments for depression, and years go by, and nothing happens? Well, you get creative, in a sometimes desperate attempt to alleviate suffering. It is easy to disdain the endeavor in a blog, with no patient sitting across from you.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Clinic
If that happens to a therapist on a frequent basis, it's a good sign that he or she has a really tough population, ought to consider career change, or is in fact a fictional character. In fact, I can envision a Kafkaesque cross between The Truman Show and In Treatment in which a therapist gradually comes to realize that he is actually starring in a television series. He ascends through a series of clinical supervisors in a vain attempt to break out of the fictional frame. Therapy as Plato's cave, on two levels. Probably wouldn't appeal to a mass audience.
2. I saw my first case of self-diagnosed swine flu yesterday. I'm sure that's happening millions of times over in doctor's offices all over the world, but at least this guy had the excuse of having schizophrenia.
3. I don't do prison work per se, but a number of folks follow up at the clinic after "discharge" from incarceration. One irony is that they often got more expensive meds in prison than they can afford after release. Also, I can imagine that even in a booming economy it's awfully tough for a felon to get a job; in the current climate it seems to be essentially impossible. That's the sort of thing that might drive a person to...crime.
4. For the pharmacologists...no matter how long you do this, you'll still encounter something new every now and then. A guy with (subjectively) terrible anxiety comes in and asks to stop his Klonopin in favor of a drug he had in the hospital that had miraculous effects on his nerves. It was Vistaril. My pleasure, at least until he comes back in, having realized he confused it with something else. It's nice to be able to give someone what they want for a change.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Where is Wisdom to be Found?
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Wednesday, March 18, 2009
On Med-Seeking
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Hard Labor
Sunday, March 1, 2009
How Much Time Do I Have?

Thursday, February 5, 2009
Psycho-Logical
Friday, January 30, 2009
Freitag...Friday...Free Day

Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Clinical Notes
Sunday, December 21, 2008
(Not) Just Another Day at the Office (continued)
That often madness hits on, which reason and sanity
Could not so prosperously be delivered of.
Polonius
A young fellow comes in, for a routine check-in after hospital discharge. He has been diagnosed with schizophrenia, although he disputes that (surprise). But he protests that what he really needs is not "pills," but rather housing and a job. "All you all ever talk about is pills...always more pills...what am I supposed to leave my kids, a bunch of pills?"
Good question. Fortunately his community support worker is sitting in with us; hopefully she has all kinds of great ideas for him. His last job was $7 an hour at Biscuitville, and with gas prices being what they were then, what was the point, really? The Obama campaign/transition team keeps sending me emails--what are they going to do for him?
Another guy, middle-aged this time. It sounds like he was quite successful, with a high-paying sales job and a family until he developed a severe psychotic disorder several years ago. Since then it has been steeply downhill, with several hospitalizations, disability, and divorce.
I had first met him a few weeks ago, when his family brought him in in a floridly psychotic state. At that time he was disheveled, paranoid, and exhibited thought-blocking. This time it is after his discharge and I barely recognize him. To be sure, his appearance is subtly off: a few hairs out of place, and a jacket that is a bit too long and too bright. But he is making an effort, and arrives early for his appointment.
He has been put on prodigious amounts of haloperidol, both oral and by long-acting injection, but he tolerates it without complaint. His chief concern seems to be a compound of loneliness and futility. He is heartbroken over not having seen his kids for months, and his ex-wife seems to have been able to deny him access. He wants to look into working and being productive again, like he used to be. Yet he sheepishly allows glimpses of persisting delusional systems. I don't think he could or should hold a regular job at this point. He lives alone, but does attend a church, and has some support from his family of origin. He has lost almost everything.
Why?
Friday, December 12, 2008
Noises in the Attic
Alas, how is't with you,
That you do bend your eye on vacancy,
And with th'incorporeal air do hold discourse?
Gertrude
(Illustration by Adolf Wolfli, hospitalized for psychosis in Berne, Switzerland from 1895 until his death in 1930).
Auditory hallucinations are the darndest thing. We all have our moments in life obviously, and I think that my own experiences plus a willing imagination can provide at least a vague idea of what it might be like to undergo a good number of the clinical syndromes I see. Can I know exactly? Of course not, as some patients like to point out, but that is always the case between two people (can they know exactly what it is like to be me?). Like any decent doctor or therapist, I make the effort and continually check in with the person in question to see how my imagined approximation is holding up.
Voices are tough though, as I have never experienced anything like them. The ominous creak upstairs, the pillow in the dark mistaken for something else, yes, but voices are something else entirely. I doubt that dreams provide any semblance of waking hallucinations. I can only imagine that they are disturbing at the least and potentially terrifying. My lack of experience makes me all the more curious about what it might be like to have them, so I hope that imagination gives empathy a needed boost.
Voices are most commonly associated with schizophrenia, but they constitute psychotic symptoms that may occur in various other conditions: severe depression or mania, substance abuse or withdrawal, and various neurological disorders such as dementia and delirium. Visual hallucinations can occur along with voices, but the former are more commonly seen in "organic" conditions such as substance withdrawal and delirium. Atypical voices can occur with borderline personality disorder or post-traumatic stress disorder. Not long ago I saw someone with voices that, she volunteered, had names. This is unusual, and given her history of severe abuse, it may suggest dissociative identity disorder (the same as "multiple personality disorder").
If someone hears the voice of a loved one who has died, this is considered normal. Similarly, hearing the voice of God is normal if such is culturally appropriate for the person and not accompanied by psychopathology. It is also possible, although perhaps rare and certainly not well understood, for some people to have random and isolated auditory hallucinations without having a psychiatric or neurologic condition.
Like much in psychiatry, the heterogeneity of auditory hallucinations is impressive. Most commonly they are strange (i.e. not sounding like anyone known to the patient) and derogatory. That is, they utter insults, often using profanity. Somewhat less commonly, they issue commands, sometimes bizarre and sometimes threatening.
But auditory hallucinations can be quite subtle, and in those cases it is hard to know how aggressively to go after them (particularly when they aren't obviously distressing to the patient). Someone may hear faint voices but be unable to make out what they are saying (this is often described as hearing a barely audible conversation in an adjoining room). They may hear noises that don't seem "real" (i.e. generated by the physical environment) but that aren't voices. Some people hear music; this seems to occur with the elderly more often. Some of this may be more likely with the relative sensory deprivation of hearing loss.
When it comes to true schizophrenia, there is nothing quite like seeing someone in the grip of a first psychotic break, or in the months thereafter. There is a distinct air of dismay, bewilderment, and consternation. The patient appears at once puzzled, confused, and afraid. I am often surprised that patients and their families are not particularly focused on the diagnosis--it is as if they know already at some level. I give it to them anyway as gently as I can (or remind them as the case may be) and emphasize manageability of symptoms with treatment.
The psychotherapy of psychosis involves education and intentional self-distraction among other things. People in the grip of voices sometimes wander long distances away from home, as if they are being hounded. It takes them a while to learn and to believe that they don't have to listen to the voices, that the voices, despite their threats, are actually powerless to hurt them or anyone else. People who have lived with schizophrenia for years become relatively accustomed to voices, although they can obviously still be upset and agitated by an exacerbation.
While recent studies have suggested that older antipsychotic drugs (like haloperidol (Haldol)) are every bit as good as newer ones, in my experience the newer ones are better tolerated in a subjective sense. Patients are more willing to take them. The metabolic side effects (weight gain and diabetes) can be a major problem.
In the ten years since residency I have never accepted drug company gifts or support of any kind. So my drug preferences are based on what I read in the literature and my experience with patients. Risperidone (Risperdal) is my favorite antipsychotic to start with; it seems to balance solid effectiveness with good tolerability. I found out the other day that 30 doses of generic risperidone 3 mg was only $46; I was surprised, that almost approaches affordability.
Olanzapine (Zyprexa) has the worst metabolic side effects on average, but its efficacy is impressive; it is often a reasonable option for those having major insomnia and who are thin (to start with). Unfortunately it is exorbitantly pricy. Quetiapine (Seroquel) is well-tolerated, but as it too can cause weight gain (and is very expensive too), so is often prescribed too loosely for insomnia and anxiety (in the absence of psychosis). Aripiprazole (Abilify) is a decent alternative because it produces less drowsiness and weight gain, but not uncommonly it generates unpleasant akathisia (a restless feeling).
The other day at our small clinic 37 patients received their monthly or bimonthly antipsychotic injections (they are for people who cannot or will not keep up with taking pills daily, but these kinds of shots are voluntary). I heard that Risperdal Consta now comes with a smaller needle for deltoid rather than gluteal use; I suppose that is an improvement. I imagine it must hurt though.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Lugubrious Lucubrations
If you're down he'll pick you up, Doctor Robert
Take a drink from his special cup, Doctor Robert
Doctor Robert, he's a man you must believe,
Helping everyone in need
No one can succeed like Doctor Robert.
Lennon/McCartney
Psychiatry is mostly unlike the rest of medicine, for better and worse, but it seems to me it has some things in common with my (admittedly distant) understanding of what a pain specialist does. If any of the latter happen to read this, set me straight.
1. Mental disorders, like pain syndromes, are often correlated with objective factors, but they are nonetheless fundamentally subjective and therefore frequently misunderstood and vulnerable to stigma. Diagnosis is therefore ambiguous and liable to being contested.
2. Both mental disorders and pain syndromes may get better with the mere passage of time. Watchful waiting is always an option.
3. Conservative treatment methods (psychotherapy/physical therapy) should be considered first.
4. Both mental and pain disorders are at risk of settling into chronic pernicious syndromes (often in a mutually reinforcing way).
5. Medication treatments in both carry the risk of addiction, sometimes iatrogenic. This can create tension in the clinical relationship.
6. In both psychiatry and pain medicine, simple cases are rare because primary care physicians have already taken care of most of those.
7. Both mental and physical distress are sensitive to suggestion and placebo (or nocebo) effect, both cultural and medical.
8. The treatments are broad in their effects and not specifically pegged to diagnosis; therapy is therefore more empirical and pragmatic than theoretical.
9. The aim is not cure, but rather symptomatic management either indefinitely or until the episode gets better on its own.
10. Both physical pain and emotional distress, beyond a certain point, threaten to become all-encompassing and to monopolize consciousness.
11. Both physical and emotional pain are necessary and at times even advantageous, but one can have too much of a good thing.
12. People may be growing less stoic, more sensitive to both physical and emotional distress in contemporary culture. There is a straight line between aspirin and Prozac.